Nausea, tiredness, losing weight. These were the first indicators that something might be wrong for Sharon O’Sullivan.
She and husband John had been in the South Island in July 2025, and, when back home, Sharon checked in with her GP.
Subsequent tests in late August showed she had cancer of the colon, with advanced secondaries. Finding out was a shock, especially given how advanced the cancer was, and having only recently experienced some symptoms of the disease. With no time to waste, emergency palliative surgery was scheduled. This was helpful, as was subsequent chemotherapy.
“The chemotherapy was very hard on her, but the preliminary results showed the cancer markers had been knocked back 70 percent. That meant she’d potentially been given months, maybe years more — it was encouraging news,” John said.
Sadly, the chemotherapy subsequently proved to be too damaging for her. A conference with her consultant, Richard Isaacs, saw the O’Sullivans conclude that it was appropriate to stop the chemo. Unchecked, the cancer surged, and Sharon died peacefully at home on December 1. John and his adult children, Kate and David, were with her.
It happened so fast it was difficult to comprehend, but John said a huge help in the entire situation was the involvement of Arohanui Hospice, in early September, after the chemotherapy treatment had ceased. With Hospice support, Sharon was able to remain at home until the end.
Hospice nurse Vanessa Davey came to see the family. A sense of calm and a feeling of control came with her. John said his work as an educator meant he’d dealt with many agencies, often simultaneously, but he’d never before experienced such seamless, confidence-inspiring, inter-agency help. Communications were outstanding — John was dealing with caregivers, district nurses, pharmacies, oncologists, and needing specialist equipment to help care for Sharon at home. Vanessa and the Hospice just made it all happen.
“It was simply the best joined-up interagency situation I’ve been in. Communications were outstanding, rapid and helpful,” John said. “It wasn’t smothering, they didn’t try and take over. Their knowledge and experience helped underpin our autonomy to make the best decisions, with Sharon fully involved.”
Something that really helped John was the 24-hour emergency phone service the Hospice provides its patients. Carers can ring at any time of the day or night, with any concerns at all, and get experienced, qualified help, at whatever level is required.
“There comes a time at 2am, when it’s a long way to 7am,” John said, referring to helping Sharon manage middle-of-the-night pain. “They were so reassuring and helpful.”
Arohanui Hospice helped John maintain a sense of calm and serenity for Sharon and himself, something that was very important for the family. “No panic. No sense of spinning out of control. It never felt unmanageable, right to Sharon’s last breath.”
John paid particular tribute to the Hospice staff’s ability to help manage Sharon’s pain. There’s a fine line between being in pain and being over-medicated, and excellent communications meant they all got it right for Sharon. This enabled her to have some sense of control and maintain her relentlessly positive attitude to life.
John said Sharon’s family and friends were a big help. Daughter Kate resigned from her job to spend quality time with her Mum in her final days. Managed visits buoyed Sharon, encouraged John, and practical help was always offered.
Sharon’s professional life had been teaching, initially in primary schools, but mostly in Massey University’s English Language Centre, mainly teaching overseas students. This interest arose from her deep involvement in supporting Cambodian refugees as they came to grips with a new life in a strange society.
Her private life involved extensive reading, gardening and time with her beloved grandchildren, family and friends.
Her funeral, held in a lovely garden setting, happened to be the day before the couple’s 48th wedding anniversary.
The support of Arohanui Hospice helped to ensure that the final phase of Sharon’s life enabled dignity and gratitude to flourish.
